My Improvement Plan

There are many things that I know I need to improve upon in my communication with others expecially speaking infront of groups. My top five that I would like to improve by the end of the semester are:
1. Feeling more comfortable infront of an audience
2. While talking, I would like to quit using umm and like when I have to pause to
gather my thoughts
3. I would like to work on making better eye contact with the audience that I'm
speaking to
4. Improving my use of space that is available. Utilizing the whole area and not
just standing in one spot the entire time
5. Work on analyzing my audience and better reading their nonverbal language to help
while giving a presentation

These are my five goals that I hope to improve upon by the end of the semester

Weekend from Down Under

Wow! This has been one interesting weekend or shall I say extended weekend. Firstly, I'll put out a disclaimer that some of the information in here was given to me by others because frankly I didn't remember any of it. Thursday the softball team travelled to SWOSU in Weatherford for a doubleheader. The first game was going ok, we were a little rusty, but overall we were doing well. In the fourth inning I went in to play third, which isn't my normal position, and everything was going ok. In the fifth inning we had a bunt situation and the batter for SWOSU squared to bunt and I came crashing in. This is the start of where information had to be filled in by others and lasted till roughly saturday morning. The girl pulled back and ripped a line drive right at me and it hit me in the head. I immeadiately dropped to the ground. The only thing I can remember is waking up with people all around me and after that I really don't know. I remember bits and pieces of the medical attention but not a whole lot. I stayed at the field with the team for the next game because my parents hadn't come to these games. After the games were over one of our assistant JV coaches, who had come out to the game, drove me back to the city to meet up with my dad. My dad took me to the ER to be checked out because, after taking a hit like that there should obviously be swelling and I didn't have any signs of external swelling which meant everything was swelling in. When a head trauma swells inward there stands a good possibility that there is bleeding of the brain. Luckily after having a CAT scan they found there was no bleeding just large amounts of swelling. The doctor said that I had a sever concussion and had to be carefully monitored to make sure there wasn't a delay in bleeding or anything else serious. I was released from the hospitol to go home to the care of my parents only because my dad is EMT certified and knew the proper care. That night I had to be woken up every two hours and neurological tests given everytime, which made for a long night. Friday and Saturday I literally layed at home and did nothing. The big trip of the day was me going from the living room chair and a-half, which had become my home, to the bathroom and back to the chair. I had several visitors throughout friday and saturday but like I've said, I don't remember. Saturday evening I started to become a little more aware of the happenings around me, but I still had a migrane from you know where! You're probably asking, Well why didn't you take anything to help with the headache? I was taking medicine but with how bad my head was hurting I had sever nauseua. So, everytime I would try and take my medicine I would become sick and couldn't keep it down. Thus, before we could start on the headache I had to get my stomache under control. I finally got to where I could keep my pain medicine down Friday night, a whole day later. Most of the weekend I spent asleep on my chair oblivious to my surroundings. I went for a recheck yesterday and the doctor said I still have a lot of swelling in my head and I still get nausious, dizzy, and I still can't eat very much without becoming sick. At least I'm allowed back at school now. It's going to be tough though. Even typing this makes my head hurt worse, staring at the screen and having to read what I type. These are just obsticles I'm having to overcome in my return to school. What a weekend it has been!

Definitions and Examples

Denotative Language is the literal meaning of a word. Ex: cat – a four-legged feline

Connotative Language is the emotional meaning of a word. Ex: I tell my friend my dog died and she doesn’t fully understand because she doesn’t have a pet and doesn’t like dogs.

Low-context cultures are cultures that use what you hear is what you get communication.
Ex: when someone says yes, they are saying affirmative, in agreement.

Indexing is knowing that there are exceptions when making a general statement(s). Ex: men are stronger than women; but Lauren is stronger than Zac.

Kinesics is body motions. Ex: making direct eye contact, posture, or gestures.

Emblems are objects people have or wear on them or on clothing. Ex: a certain symbol on a pieces of jewelry

Haptics is the use of touch to relay a specific emotion or feeling. Ex: shaking hands

Paralanguage is reading the tone of a person’s voice. Ex: I say I’m fine but when you listen to my voice it has a higher pitch than normal meaning that something is wrong.

Artifacts are objects a person has. Ex: a woman carrying a purse,

Monochronic Time is being very punctual, everything has an order and it’s finished in that order and must be accomplished before being satisfied. Time is viewed as a scarce resource and if not used efficiently it is viewed as being wasted Ex: if a person is just a few minutes late to a meeting, an apology or explanation is expected.

Polychronic Time is the belief that time is continuous and people engage in many activities at one time. Ex: if a meeting is arranged one person might be on time but the other just shows up whenever convenient for him and it is viewed as acceptable.

Chronemics is how time is spent. Ex: one person’s day is packed full of events until the day is over and another person just takes what the day has to offer having nothing planned

We need to study and be aware of these concepts when communicating because within communication there is always an underlying message a person is trying to relay and if we can understand what’s being said without words it will help us relate to others better and can help better relationships.

Lets Talk Pineapple

Well, things at home are a little better than the last time I went home. I really didn’t see my dad much while I was home because he had to work, which sucks. My mom hung out around the house with my boyfriend and me. Oh yeah, I forgot to mention Shawn spent the whole weekend with me. So, there’s all of the serious out of the way. I love my mom and her sense of humor! Saturday after my mom, Shawn, and I watched the OU game (yes I watched, but only because Shawn’s an alumni from there), my mom decided she was going to go to the grocery store so we could have food to cook for dinner and to also get me food to bring back to the dorm. She asked if I had any requests, which was a wasted question, because I always do. I told her that I wanted some cereal, peanut butter, some salad dressing, you know the usual stuff, but then I had one super special request. I wanted her to get me some fresh pineapple. So, my mom went to the store and did her thing and Shawn and I took our afternoon nap. When my mom got back my younger sister was helping her unload groceries. Since I had just woke up, be honest, I really wasn’t going to help carry anything. I’m laying in the living room when I hear my sister ask my mom why she bought a pineapple. I wasn’t thinking and I said that it’s mine so that I can take it back with me and have fresh fruit to eat. Little did I know that when I said fresh, my mom took it to heart. I thought she would buy one of those plastic containers of “fresh” pineapple for me to have. Instead I go into the kitchen to find a pineapple sitting on the counter, looking like it had just arrived from the tropics. Moral of this story, besides a really good laugh, when I tell my mom I want something I need to be more specific with the details. The good thing though, I had really fresh pineapple to take back with me!

September 5, 2007

My self-concept has definitely affected my communication. I went through a time where I didn’t find myself to be very knowledgeable and when I felt that way it showed in how I communicated. When I would talk to people I would never correct the person even when I knew they were wrong because I didn’t find myself to be that smart and so it was my belief that if someone got a different answer than me then they must be correct because they are much smarter than me.
To me one of the biggest stereotypes that I have gotten from TV or other media is about girls that come from wealthier backgrounds. Media portrays these girls to be very cold hearted and quite witchy in their ways. It shows them as not being satisfied unless they are receiving everything they need and want. These girls are supposed to be the big “party” girls that are always sleeping around with different guys other than their boyfriend. These are the ones that can’t wait till the weekend to party and see how drunk they can get. They are the ones that can’t go to target to shop but instead their whole wardrobe must be from Hollister or some ritzy boutique.
In my daily life I will use perception checking with my boyfriend and my parents. I can use this with my boyfriend to tell whether he had a good day at work or not and then with that information I can decide how I want to approach him and what kind of conversation I want to have with him. With my parents, I can use perception checking to figure out if they are mad about a decision I’ve made or whether they are having a bad day. I know that if they have had a bad day I need to be careful with what I do and say to keep from further aggravating them.

Broken Foundation

I went home this weekend to spend time with my family and my boyfriend, but what I thought was going to be a great weekend turned out to be the worst weekend of my life. Friday and Saturday went pretty well all things considered. Saturday night my boyfriend fell asleep at my house and ended up just staying the night. Well Sunday when my dad got up he totally flipped. We had both slept in the living room but on separate pieces of furniture. Well, Shawn staying the night was just a minor flame to my dad’s rage. My dad totally flipped out on my mom and me. Trying to be rational I told my dad that I needed to talk to him to try and fix things. After talking, or trying to talk, to my dad I have never felt so hurt or broken in my life. Some of the things he said were so hurtful that I don’t know if our relationship will ever be the same. I talked to my mom and found out a lot of information that I guess I’ve know but wasn’t completely sure of, well after this whole blow up I’m sure of it. It’s like my dad is making me choose between him and my boyfriend when what I really want is both. I’m not quite sure what to do right now. I’m so hurt that I honestly don’t know if these wounds can ever be repaired. I really don’t want to go into detail about everything thing that happened because I don’t know if I can stand to relive it. This morning my mom and I had a deep conversation about some options that we have and neither of us knows exactly what we should do. My dad has locked himself in their bedroom since he got home yesterday so I didn’t even see him, which is ok because I don’t want to speak to him right now anyway. It’s so hard seeing my mom hurt and feeling how bad I hurt. I know everything will work out in one-way or another but the pain I’m feeling right now feels like it will never go away